Not everyone is coping very well, and I can understand. I have been dealing with my own issues, battling myself and coming to terms with everything I went through in the past, and after about 6 weeks I’ve landed in a place of building the future, now!
I know I’m not the only one feeling this, and I also know why I’m feeling this way. Isolation is my depression pattern.
How COVID-19 allowed me to acknowledge & heal my depression
For the first 3 weeks of COVID-19 I had an ear infection, which left me feeling as though I had it. I never went to get tested, I never even left my bedroom, for 3 weeks.
In this span of time, I started watching several Netflix shows, one of which is The Simpsons, which is the longest-running television series currently.
When I wasn’t watching the Simpsons, I also took time to make bracelets, meditate, write and work on self-love practices.
These actions may sound counter intuitive, but there is a reason.
From personal experiences, mainly during university and difficult times in my life, I formed a coping habit. Psychology calls them coping mechanisms and defence mechanisms, which are blocks that are put up when dealing with stressful situations.
This coping habit came up for me while being in isolation. My sleeping pattern also reversed, sleeping during the day, and being awake at night.
The only way to combat these habits, as from my past experiences is either with medication, or counselling. However, the most valuable shift in my habits occurred when I acknowledged them with love!
What depression is to me, and why
Depression, for me, is a lack of joy. It is a lack of inspiration to get up and do life. There is this pit of darkness that says why bother, and pushes me back into bed.
Fighting this darkness isn’t a simple battle. There is no instant solution. The only solution is to connect with the vibrational energy of love.
To see myself as sad, lonely, and disconnected from my purpose and still give myself love.
Someone who feels this darkness might wonder how to love the darkness, and I have an answer.
The answer is because you deserve to build your future, now! Not tomorrow, not the next day, or the week after, but today is your future.
The truth is, depression is pain. There is no cure for emotional pain that we hold down until we are ready, with mind body and spirit to release the pain of the past, we cannot build the future.
I couldn’t see a future for myself until I joined my alumni association and found a place where my potential is seen and acknowledged by others.
Sometimes, community is the thing we are all seeking.
Practical tips for those struggling
I changed several things about my daily routine because of COVID-19 and it caused my depression pattern to reappear.
I haven’t dealt with this depression pattern since my family dog died in 2017.
The toll of the emotional loss, while living with family made it harder to grapple with.
Here are some practical patterns to form instead of giving in to your depression pattern.
1. Work on your mindset
If you are like me, and cannot see anything outside the fog of depression, this will be hard.
I started with listening to YouTube clips of Abraham Hicks in January this year.
I also started working on my blog in September, which gave me something to focus on as now.
Even if there is no future in this blog, I am the one who determines what is written, when it is posted, and how it looks.
Changing your mindset about the meaning of your life, requires making peace with your past, no matter how difficult it may seem, it is possible.
Practicing mindful awareness of habits can help as well, simply acknowledging your emotions as they come, including negative ones can help you to gain control over the emotional state of your mind.
2. Create a focus wheel and learn the emotional scale
This scale has helped me the most. I never really learned how to acknowledge my own emotions and how to bring myself out of a negative emotion.
A focus wheel is a process that is given in The Amazing Power of Deliberate intent by Esther and Jerry Hicks.
It works simply by acknowledging what you don’t have, and writing statements that contain positive or neutral language until you feel emotionally and vibrationally better about the situation.
These techniques are similar to DBT which is treatment for borderline personality, which is part of my story.
I never received DBT treatment but taught it to myself through workbooks and self practice.
3. Connect with yourself by laughing and having fun!
How can COVID-19 be fun? Well, this amount of time at home can be the perfect opportunity to learn a new skill, connect with others who are at home as well, and create community from a distance.
Have you ever had a Skype party? One where you ask your friends silly questions and laugh at the funniest stories they have to tell?
I encourage you to plan one with your friends!
Consider this the portal to your future, the world is paralyzed by fear, but you can work on building the future, now!
Remember…
Everyone is taking this one day at a time, and if you’re struggling with a depression pattern, or are spiralling even further into the pit, reach out to someone you trust and know that you are not alone in this.
There is so much love here for you in this universe! Try writing a letter to the universe and surrender your emotions to the present moment. Try something new and jump into the tik tock world of silly dog videos!
My point is, work on building yourself up, so you can build the future you want from this moment forward.
With love and light,
~~ stay true, stay weird ~~
~~ Kristi